Before we tie a big, fat bow on this year’s box of ups, down and go-arounds, I‘d like to give props to Spam, the wondrous food that started my relationship with Creative Loafing (the newspaper that I write a weekly food column for) earlier this year when I dared editor Max to lose his spam virginity to me. And yes, I was gentle. I fed him luscious morsels of Spam nestled in mounds of snowy, fluffy, white rice.
It’s not an easy task, convincing people to willingly eat meat that comes in its own coffin, especially after hearing the “STHLURP” as it slithers out and the “STHLUNK” as it lands on the counter top in a quivering, solid, gelatinous mass.
But once you get over that part, it’s delicious, savory and like a pair of tight Levi’s, it goes with just about anything. Feed me a Spam wrapped as sushi, diced in an omelet or grilled between buns of a burger, and I’m as happy as gorilla in heat.
Outside of Hawaii, though, Spam is like the ugly step-child, banned to the tippy top shelf towards the back, so far out of my 5’2” reach that I have to ask for help. Everyone shopping within earshot of the supermarket bullhorn, “customer needs assistance reaching Spam in aisle two,” stares at me as if I had just asked to be spanked with a corn tortilla. But, come on, it’s just pork in a can with a pop-top. See that gorgonzola cheese in your cart? It’s really rotting mold from a cow’s tits. Don’t you dare judge me!
I betcha can’t name another food product that pairs well with Champagne, can spawn a Monty Python sketch and kept troops alive and well-fed during WWII. So, go ahead and pick up a can of Spam the next time you’re at the market. Just say aloud, “this would be great for the hurricane box,” if you’re embarrassed.
To get you in the mood, I’m re-posting my Ode to Spam in the Style of Seuss.
Jaden’s Ode to Spam in the Style of Seuss
Do you like Fried Rice and Spam?
Would you? Could you? In a wok?
Would you like them gently tossed?
Would you like them with fish sauce?
Would you like them cut up silly?
Would you like them with fried chilli?
Would you eat ‘em with a spork?
Would you eat ‘em with with roast pork?
You may like them, they’re not obscene
You may like them in chow mien.
Eat them! Eat them! There they are!
Eat them! Eat them! Be a Spam superstar!
Spam Fried Rice
I actually prefer fish sauce instead of soy sauce in my fried rice. If you have fish sauce, replace the soy with 1 tsp of fish sauce.
3 cups cold, cooked rice, chunks broken up so grains are loose & separate
1/2 can of Spam, cut into small dice
2 eggs, beaten
2 stalks green onion, minced
1 tsp minced garlic
1 tsp grated fresh ginger
2 cups fresh spinach leaves, finely chopped
1 tbl Chinese rice wine (or dry sherry)
2 tsp soy sauce (or 1 tsp fish sauce)
freshly ground black pepper
1. Heat cooking oil in large pan over medium high heat. When oil is hot, add eggs and gently stir to cook eggs. When eggs are about 80% cooked through (still a little runny), remove from pan and set aside. Wipe pan clean.
2. Turn heat to high. Add a little more cooking oil to pan. When hot, add diced Spam to the pan. Cook until spam is browned on all sides. Add green onions, ginger and garlic, fry until fragrant. Add spinach, fry until softened. Add rice and the cooked eggs and toss to incorporate all ingredients throughout rice.
3. Let it all just sit still in the pan so that the grains of rice have a chance to heat up, about 1 minute. Toss so that the rice that is on the top now is on the bottom. Add cooking wine and soy sauce and stir again. Season with fresh ground pepper. Cook until every grain of rice is heated through.
4. Taste…salty enough? If not, add a little more soy. But since the spam is salty already, you might want to go light on the soy.
***
Free Spam Book + SK Care Package Drawing!
Check out the “Toastvertising” video created by the authors of a very cool book, 
The Book of Spam
I’m giving away a copy of The Book of Spam + a Very Special Super Cool Steamy Kitchen Care Package full of kitchen goodies, spices and….well, it will be a surprise, ok?
To enter, comment below answering any of the following:
What’s your favorite way to have Spam?
If you’re a Spam-Virgin, why haven’t you tried? If I send you a can ‘o Spam, would you try it??
Contest ends January 1st 12pm.
{ 150 comments… read them below or add one }
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When Span goes on sale, I must purchase a couple of extra cans in case of emergencies. Of course you can always buy in bulk at Costco. Ok, ok, what can I say; I grew up in Hawaii and have a passion for Spam. While I love a good Spam Musubi, I’ve managed to combine three of my loves Spam, tofu and zucchini into a menage-a-trois of sorts. Basically I stir fry all three, adding chicken broth for a little gravy action. Onolicious! (Hawaiian translation: Yummy for the tummy).
I am a spam virgin. Why haven’t I tried? Prabu’s friend told me “Oh-so-nasty” stories that had spam, college and drinking in it. I never looked at a can of spam the same way from that day. I have to confess though, that spam fried rice you make sounds and looks too good not to eat and Prabu has been bugging me to make it.
I think I might lose my virginity over it one of these days
“Spam? (quickly does a Google search and realizes its also an ingredient and not just used to name those ugly emails we get in our inbox)
Okay. So I am spam virgin (I like the sound of that). Would love to cook with it but I am in India and its not easy to get all the exotic stuff that I see in your blog. Makes me feel ugghh sometimes but, hey! We do get a lot of nice stuff in India too, so all is cool.
Lovely pic, by the way
And I am glad you took that pic of yours away from the banner. This one is simpler and so much nicer!”
Nope, I’ve never tried it. Why? Color, texture, everything! Sorry, Jaden, but I just can’t get myself to try it.
Growing up, Spam was a cheap meat ingredient to fill out the fried rice. Not enough soy sauce chicken or barbeque pork? Add some Spam. When I married, hubby had no idea the fried rice he enjoyed at my mom’s table was leftover rice and contained Spam. He had poor memories of the potted meat through his mom. I’m not sure what was created with Spam, but they don’t talk about it.
I have made Spam musubi, and enjoy that too. I have even soaked Spam in green dye to create green eggs and ham for my son. For anyone interested, 2 drops dye to 1 egg scrambled, the Spam requires a whole ounce bottle and an over night soaking to only achieve a slight green tint. Better just use a green tinted batter to coat the Spam. So, can anyone tell I had too much time on my hands when my son was little?
I have never had SPAM but, after seeing that toast commercial yesterday, I gazed at it in the grocery store with grossed-out curiosity.
I think that I’ve never tried it b/c something about potted meat makes me feel squicky inside. It will be salty, it will have that meat jell-o stuck to it, it will feel like it’s been pressed together and the texture will be slimy and gristly.
But if you sent me some, I would gobble it right up. (Or, at least, gobble up that first bite!)
Spam fried rice was a staple in our home when I was young. It was a fav with our whole family. Thanks for bringing back all those memories.
Happy New Year, Jaden!
I like Spam in sandwiches, nestled between some eggs. YUM! I also think it’s great in fried rice!
Hi Jaden! I love your site. The photos are delicious and your wicked sense of humor really sets you apart from a lot of other food bloggers.
I haven’t had spam in AGES! It’s been at least 5-10 years (but I did see Spamalot last year, does that count?). We used to cut SPAM thin, fry it in a skillet and eat it with mayo on soft white loaf bread. Best sandwhich ever! I think you’ve inspired me to go buy a can
A Spam breakfast skillet is a beautiful thing. Cubed Spam, chopped sweet onion, bell pepper, and sun-dried tomatoes, all sauted in olive oil till crispy, topped with some good shredded cheddar and a couple over-easy eggs. Now that I think of it, a Spamasian breakfast skillet would be cool … cubed Spam, a little bit of yesterday’s rice, some water chestnuts, a few bean sprouts, maybe some black soy sauce, all stir-fried for a few, garnished with some hard-boiled quail eggs … yeah, that would work!
When I lived in Southern California, my gym was right across the street from a restaurant called Hawaii Loft, which served a delicious spam-fried rice. They also served slabs of fried spam as an entree, but I didn’t order that one often, because I LOVED their Island Fried Chicken with spam-fried rice on the side. I tried to recreate the Island Fried Chicken once and was *almost* successful–the result was good, but just not as tasty as the chicken from the restaurant.
Sure, it’s a little counterintuitive to pick up take-out containers of fried spam and fried chicken after going to the gym, but I figured I had earned it!
I’ve only had spam once, and it was about 8 years ago when my dad opened a can of it, fried it black and then drowned it in BBQ sauce. I guess I can say that my experience doesn’t “count”.
I bet the care package has spam in it.
Not a Spam virgin. We ate it in sandwiches when I was little, probably my dad’s idea. And I even tried using it for Sweet and Sour a time or two. I still get the occasional craving for it. Have you had Taylor Ham, that New Jersey addiction? It’s pretty much Spam in a giant roll, although don’t say that in the hearing of anyone from NJ. Those cement overshoes are damned uncomfortable. /;+)))
We also made our Ruebens with canned corned beef, again, not sure why. But, by the time I finally had one with the “real” stuff, it was too late. I was hooked on the canned – the spreadable texture just seemed so much more pleasing than those strips of semi-dry meat. I always keep a can or two at home for my secret enjoyment. Heh.
My Mom’s SPAM Casserole is my favorite SPAM dish.
http://watkinslynn.typepad.com/pages_pucks_and_pantry/2007/08/rozs-spam-casse.html
It was a staple in our household while I was growing up (can you tell I’m a child of the 50’s?). A couple of months ago I tried your SPAM fried rice recipe from May…used our $10 can of Commemorative SPAMalot SPAM (hey, I was hungry and the can was just sitting there) we bought at the show in Vegas. My husband can now no longer say he would never eat SPAM as he’s had two meals with SPAM and ate every last bite!
A SPAM virgin? It sounds so naughty, I almost wish I was one. Having been an Army-Brat and lived for a year in Hawaii when I was 6, I can say that I lost my SPAM cherry at a young age. To be honest, I hadn’t realized there was such an aversion to SPAM until relatively recently. Sure, it sounds funny in a Monty Python sketch, but I just thought everyone had or did eat it. Shows what I know.
I can’t understand the aversion, I think it just comes from the misguided idea that the sandwich meat or hot dogs that you buy at the deli are somehow less processed than canned SPAM. Shows how little people know about their food and how it is made.
My favorite way to eat SPAM is also the simplest – sliced thin and in a sandwich. I prefer a darker or stronger tasting bread, like a dark wheat or rye to match the SPAM and slices of sharp cheddar cheese and strong mustard. You can grill it also. Actually, makes my mouth water just thinking of it.
I can say that my Russian wife is a SPAM virgin (sorry, didn’t mean to out you like that dear). I think her aversion is due to her not having tried it and Russian suspicion of anything jarred or canned.
I must admit I am a Spam virgin but curiously so…if I win the can o’meatproduct, I’ll take pictures of my first experience and send them to you. Oh, I feel so NAUGHTY promising to display my food porn. Keep up the good work into the new year!
I can’t believe how many people have never tried SPAM!
My favourite way to eat it, I must confess, is in nice thick slices, cold on a plate. If I’ve got some nice aged cheddar and some green olives and dill pickles, all the better!
I’ve never thought of putting it in sushi! My husband likes it, as many people above seem to, pan-fried. I eat it that way as well, but there are always a few slices that seem to avoid the frying pan quite nicely.
The Chinese version of spam is what we called luncheon meat. It’s mostly produced in China.
Because of some food scare recently, it was called off the shelves and we stopped the import of those cans from China. People who can’t live without turn to spam (a similar alternative with a slight difference in ingredients) or “chicken/fish spam”. Gosh where’s the good old pork
Anyway, my favourite way is to thinly slice them then pan fried. Either eat them neat or with porridge or between slices of bread. YUM!
Argus! It is the Greatwall brand. I always have a can or two in my cupboard.
I’ve been eating spam all my live that it has never crossed my mind that people may find it disgusting. Now that I think about it, it is kinda gross sounding/looking. Though that won’t stop me from buying more!
I used to eat it straight from the can with white bread as a snack when I was young. Love spam fried rice. And got my boyfriend addicted to spam with my favorite spam dish. Spaceribs, tomato soup with macaroni, topped with pan fried spam.
oops I guess the link didn’t work
http://flickr.com/photos/sylviaaaaa/1388755083/
p.s. it’s not food pron.
First, love the Ode to Spam:) Question? Would you, could you, eat Spam if you were a vegetarian?:)
when i was in fifth grade, our teacher used to have this ongoing dare where he would give us a dime if we tasted spam. there’s nothing like being dared to eat something to leave a lasting scar on your malliable childhood mind!
Never had Spam. Your spam fried rice recipe would make me want to try it– seriously! I’ve always been curious about spam musubi too– maybe I’ll make it to Hawaii someday and try it there.
Foodie soul mate, did you notice I posted Spam and kimchee fried rice just last week?
Although my favorite is still Spam musubi.
My husband is from Northern Ireland and I’m Filipino American — and what a lovely coincidence when we found out we both had a special place in our hearts for SPAM, albeit enjoyed in very different ways.
His mum sliced up the SPAM, fried the bread in butter and made little SPAM sammies.
My mom sliced up the SPAM, fried it, and then served it up with sticky white rice topped with a sunny side up egg. We’d break up the yolk on the rice and mix them both together. A comfort food that I enjoy to this day.
I cooked up SPAM, sunny side up eggs, and white rice for my husband and he in turn cooked me his SPAM fried bread sammy. How do I know it’s true love? We broaden each other’s SPAM horizon….
Oh and SPAM Royale kicks butt too.
Sliced thin, pan sauteed and then in a sandwich with chedder or American cheese, mayo and mustard. Or you can take the san sauteed slices, and use them as part of a grilled cheese sandwich. So yummy. My dad always made it that way and I have fond memories of it. I think that is one of the reasons my husband and I are together – Spam compatible!
What is musubi?
buffalo spam
1 can Turkey spam
1/8 cup favorite hot sauce (365 brand for me)
1/8 cup vinegar based hot sauce ( the clear kind with the token floating pepper is good)
1 pat butter
Slice spam into domino sized pieces. Pour hot sauce over spam slices in a shallow dish. Let marinate for 1 hour to overnight. Heat butter in frying pan. Lift spam slices out of marinade with slotted spoon and fry until each side is a nice crispy brown. Pour in 1/2 marinade and reduce by 2/3. Turn out onto plate and serve with blue cheese, celery sticks, or other favorite accompaniments, like beer.
I haven’t had Spam in a few weeks…does that make me a Spam virgin? j/k
Favorite way to eat Spam is in kimchi fried rice, but in our household we usually have it thinly sliced, pan fried with garlic, eaten with rice and cucumbers.
“STHLURP” – haha! I can imagine you mouthing out the sound and figuring out how to spell it.
Jaden,
Just popped in to wish you and your family a very happy and prosperous 2008.
I prefer Spam-fried-rice (will have to try your recipe!). My husband likes it cubed & fried on top of a salad. (I’ve never had it that way, will have to try that too!)
Have not tried Spam. Just have not gotten down to trying it.
I’ve grew up with a similar kind called Maling Luncheon Meat. One of my favorite way of preparing is fried rice, like you’ve shown above.
Just your typical Hawaiian way of enjoying Spam:
-fried slices with rice & sunny-side eggs
-Spam & fried egg sandwiches
-Spam musubi
-fried Spam slices w/ teriyaki (kabayaki) sauce
-baked slices w/ crushed pineapple & sugar glaze
-baked slices w/ guava jam or jelly & sugar glaze
-grilled Spam & cheese sandwiches
-Spam fried rice, though I usually buy at Mililani Restaurant, Mililani Shopping Center, HI
I don’t have a favorite way to eat Spam, as I’ve only had it once.
I ate it on a cracker, straight out of the can. :0P We were out in the middle of nowhere dirt biking and it was the only thing resembling meat available for lunch. I remember it was VERY salty, and I’m surprised that a reputable food blog like yours is featuring it. There must be more to it than I thought.
I’ve never had it, but my Dad has recently been saying that I should eat it for the experience… I’m always up for anything…
my husband was a spam virgin and i was no super spam fan when we met, but i thought he should try it. he still doesn’t like it, but i like spam fried rice or spam ‘n’ eggs. not enough to keep it on hand but i am still trying to let me make some spam musubi.
My fave way is to fry sliced Spam and have it in a sandwich with cuke or tomato slices(to nutritionally balance the meal). Also known to have the fried slices with sunny side up eggs for breakfast! A big hit when we go camping!
Actually, you’ve already summed up the reasons why I just can not force myself to try SPAM, even though the Hubbs loves it (pan fried, between bread with mustard).
And I quote “STHLURP slithers STHLUNK quivering, solid, gelatinous mass”
Thank you and good night!
xoxo
My favorite way to have SPAM would definitely be the simplest. If it’s a new can, I just open it up, cut a reasonable slice and then eat it with steamed white rice. Or if it’s a tad too cold, I cut it into thin slices and then fry them until it forms a crunchy outer layer (but the best part is that the inside is still quite soft!).
Hey Jaden!
To be honest, I don’t like spam. I ate it when we were kids and very poor and I never liked it. Then again I’m not one for spiced processed meat of any kind. Not even pepperoni! I know, I know, I’m a weirdo. Don’t hate me for not liking spam!
But I did love your Seussian spam ode! It was great!
What’s your favorite way to have Spam?
I like to add Spam to instant noodle. Not just any instant noodle, but those spicy Korean Kimchi instant noodle. Yum!
If you’re a Spam-Virgin, why haven’t you tried?
I’m pround to say, I’m not a virgin. Spam-Virgin that is.
If I send you a can ‘o Spam, would you try it??
Of course. Not only I’ll try it, I’ll be a few more can and have others to try it.
I would eat it in fried rice.
In fried rice it looks quite nice.
I like spam fried and sliced thin in a sandwich. My husband like his fried in a sandwich, too but adds peanut butter and strawberry jelly. Our son likes it with just the jelly added to it. I guess I just like it plain….
I love spam. What’s not to like: Chopped pork shoulder meat with ham meat added,
salt (for binding, flavor, and firmness)
water (to help in mixing), sugar (for flavor), sodium Nitrite (for colour and as a preservative). There are lite and turkey versions.
My husband likes it pan fried with fried rice or with noodles. It’s also good in congee. FYI: there’s a Spam calendar and a Hawaii’s Spam’s Cookbook, The Book of Spam, and Spam: A Biography on the market.
http://www.cusd.claremont.edu/~mrosenbl/spam.html
http://www.hormelfoods.com/brands/spam/default.aspx
If there is a place in the world that puts SPAM higher on a pedestal than Hawaii, it’s Guam, and that’s where I was born. So, I have definitely had SPAM. I actually won a preliminary round of a SPAM recipe contest a few years back when I was still living there.
My absolute favorite way to eat SPAM is sliced thin, fried and then put in between really fresh white bread with just Tabasco sauce drizzled generously on the meat. Yum!
Sliced thin and pan-fried in a pan. Then drizzled with some Indonesian sweet soy sauce and eaten with hot steamed rice. A comfort food from my childhood days in Indonesia. As I grew older and was allowed to use the stove, I sometimes fried an egg and added it to the plate.
Jaden,
first I wana say that your Spam fried rice pic is absolutely beautiful.
I grew up eating Spam musubi but sliced and fried is the way to go.
Never heard of it but would love to try! U took a good picture too!
You know what?
I’ve never had Spam before,
Never.
I should just be courageous and pick up a can of Spam next time I go to the supermarket!
I do not like Spam
I would not, could not,
eat it in a pan.
I would not, could not,
eat it from the can.
I do not like Spam.
Period.
But I like winning stuff and your blog.
I have a love-hate relationship with Spam. I remember it being as regular as lap cheong steaming away in the rice cooker or finding its way into fried rice or our egg-drop with boiled macaroni. Sometimes it was just enough to have one of those generic-canned-pork-products fried in our scrambled eggs with scallions. I think there were a few occasions where there’d be a fried slab of Spam in our fried egg sandwiches, slathered in mayo, not much else.
But ever since I’ve come into my foodie self, Spam has been a word stricken from my vocabulary. It’s so wrong, so unnatural, so subversive. A plight to gourmands and nutritionists everywhere.
And yet, when I see a pocketable, rectangular can sitting there in the aisle, or even a generic one that’s oddly shaped like the bottom of an iron in the oriental market, I still think back to much simpler times, much freer times, when Spam used to have a home in the cupboard above the stove in my mother’s house, when it would be that expected trick up my mother’s sleeve after a busy week.
Even now I can taste the saltiness of the Spam and its fried goodness in my mouth. And all I want to do is dip that fried cube in some Thai Sweet Chili sauce!
But I can’t bring myself to do it. I can’t walk to the market and scour the shelves for that yellow and blue colour scheme. I can’t whip together that elusive Spamburger or dip my gherkins in Spampat. SPAM AND WHITE STAR?! OH THE DEPRAVITY!!!
Although, if there ever were a can of Spam to be found on my doorstep from the SpamGods it would be swiftly thrown into a corner.
Where it would later be discovered and fried, on the spot. And just maybe there’d be a chilled glass of cava or spumante to wash it down.
Yes.
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