It’s getting a little hot in here

When I first heard on Twitter that I was named one of the 10 Hottest Women in Food by SlashFood, I seriously had to double-check the URL to make sure it wasn’t a spoof site, because you all know what happens when misspell a website name and end up in pornville.

Well, it was legit, and even after an hour, nobody on Twitter shouted “you’ve been punk’d!” Though if I really had really been punk’d, more than likely the person responsible would be missing a few teeth today.

The difficult part of all this is that now I really have to live up to the title…and it means that maybe being photographed in my neon hair rollers isn’t a good idea.


And I should stop slapping my head on Wonder Woman’s body.

I really am taking this honor very seriously, and have started off this week with a striptease class with 18 girlfriends at Rancho La Puerta.

Rancho La Puerta is known as one of the premier health and fitness spas in the world, and one of my biggest concerns about spending an entire week here was the fact that they serve a primarily vegetarian diet. No meat, almost no alcohol and no junk food.

Could I go a whole week without steak? bacon? wine? potato chips? Could I survive on just lettuce, sprouts and beans?

The first couple of days, the withdrawal symptoms became almost unbearable. I tweeted for help. I even texted Diane, who was to arrive the next evening to sneak in a stash of contraband chips and booze.

So, in our strip tease class, our instructor told us to imagine a guy sitting in the chair as she led us in sexylicious moves: sashaying our hips, flipping our hair, throwing an attitude, rubbing and teasing with our body parts. All for the imaginary friend sitting in the chair.

This is all I could think about:

and this:

Oh, and no I wasn’t joking about Diane smuggling in the goods. She came through. God, I love this woman. She arrived at 7pm last night with this:

I guess if this is what sexy is all about – I AM ALL FOR IT!!

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Comments 58

  1. kamran siddiqi

    Um, I’m sorry but they made a big mistake giving you that number… I think #1 was more realistic. Seriously…

    Anyways, I see no Doritos, Sun Chips, Oreos, Snickers, or Twix, OR booze. I see nothing *covering eyes.* I only see lettuce, sprouts and beans on this end. I swear!

    Now, if they find the remnants of this contraband and suspect that it was you. I could only imagine what you’d say if they caught you with a mouth full of Doritos, “I’m just munching on some delicious, plain lettuce. Yummmm…. (input sarcasm)” LOL

  2. divaindoors

    You look hot in those pics from your strip class! Looking forward to hearing if it’s good exercise. I’m sure my hubby will want me to graduate with honors!

  3. Michael Love

    Love your site…hysterical pics. Don’t ever give up bacon! Would love to link your blog as “Blogs I Like” in my sidebar, once I figure out what a widget is. Perhaps you would do the same for me. Trying to get the word out on my upcoming book, “Women Love Men Who Can Cook..”

  4. Angie

    Congrats! You completely deserve your title! No need to top doing what you do, your cute in anything. That class looks so fun! I use to do the Carmen Electra strip tease exercise videos. They were fun, but I know doing it in a class would be so much more fun, so you can snicker and tease each other, all in good fun of course!

  5. Tampa Cheryl

    You look better than Linda Carter ever did in that costume! Congrats on the honor. I love the spa story. Thanks for sharing. I would dance for a cupcake, too:-). Are you going to share spa recipes next?

  6. Stuart Reb Donald

    So, Jaden, you think you can get me Katie Lee’s number? I hear she’s recently single and we already know she’s into to older guys. LOL! Congrats, dear, you deserve it.

  7. Rachelle

    I think wine is made from grapes … and therefor counts as a fruit.

    And corn chips are made from corn … which counts as a vegetable.

    And with all the calorie burning you did dancing … you’re definitely being healthy!

    Love it. :o)

  8. Lori (A Cowboy's Wife)

    Oh grrrrrrrATE, just another thing to make your head get bigger……pffffft

    πŸ˜‰ Miss you on twitter…you’re not on as much as you used to be. I guess that’s expected when you are big time huh. {{hugs}}

  9. Chris

    You are a hoot! Congratulations on the recognition.

    Your friend’s food smuggling operation reminds me of when Cartman was in Fat Camp on South Park, hilarious.

  10. Tartelette - Helen

    You and Diane are such hot riots πŸ™‚

    So….if there is a small bonfire the day before you leave it’s just you and Diane burning wrappers to the gods of salt and animal fat, right?


  11. Dawn (KitchenTravels)

    Jaden! You rock star. I think part of the reason you were voted one of the hottest women in food is BECAUSE you post photos of yourself in giant curlers. People like people who keep it real (and real fun). Don’t go changin’! πŸ˜‰

    How was the striptease class? My girlfriends and I have talked about taking one, but haven’t jumped in yet. Looks fun!

  12. sharon

    Congrats hot momma!! Your hubby must be so proud.

    Ha, I took a striptease class and the only thing sexy about it was the instructor! Looked good when she did it, but me? Not so hot. πŸ™‚

  13. Erika

    Thats weird my comment I just typed said only one word.. “congratulations” hmm is your something wrong here?

  14. David

    I remember being there and we were playing bingo with real M&Ms. Normally, you wouldn’t think a roomful of people would be so competitive when it came to winning a single M&M. Where was Diane when I needed her??

  15. [email protected]

    Hi Jaden,
    Congrats on the award!
    So funny to see you at Rancho LaPuerta. I’ve been looking at their website all week, because I’m thinking of going for my…um…BIG birthday coming up soon
    What did you think?

  16. michelle

    Congrats on making the hot list!

    Now that you’ve done a strip tease class you HAVE to try a pole fitness class! πŸ™‚

  17. Jee

    Congratulations!! You totally deserve the honors –
    It also goes well with your blog – “steamy” kitchen!! The author is HOT!! πŸ˜‰

  18. Brooke @ Food Woolf


    So sorry I had to miss out on this great week with you. I think it’s fitting that Diane (also a very sexy woman in food) is there with you. And girl, you KNOW that woman would come through for you with the snack food!

    Congratulations on the vote from Slashfood. You’re on the top of my list for hot foodie women!

  19. Jasmine

    Congratulations! And wow, striptease class? Guess we know what’s cooking for Valentine’s this year! πŸ˜›

  20. cathy

    Hi there! I’m an on and off lurker of your site, but puns are my biggest weakness in life and I just had to leave a comment. Congratulations and thanks for the laugh :)!

  21. Liz - Meal Makeover Mom

    Congrats on being listed among the top 10 women in food. That is so HUGE! As for Rancho, I hope you attended Joe’s Friday class on “Taking the Ranch Home.” And if you did, I please let us know if striptease is something you plan to add to your regular workout repertoire once you return to reality!! Personally, I skipped that class when I was at the Ranch … but made up for it at Yuichi’s Broadway show tunes dance class!

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