Zimmern: “completely rotten, mushy onions.”

Bourdain: “…Your breath will smell as if you’d been French-kissing your dead grandmother.”

Alfred Russell Wallace, some naturalist in the 1800’s: “After a fruit-eating bat has pee’d on it.”

Henri Mouhot, French naturalist: “On first tasting it I thought it like the flesh of some animal in a state of putrefaction.”

BBC: “It has been likened to rotting onions, unwashed socks and even carrion in custard, but the most accurate description by far is that of a sewer full of rotting pineapples.”

Richard Sterling, travel/food writer: “… its odor is best described as pig-shit, turpentine and onions, garnished with a gym sock. It can be smelled from yards away. Despite its great local popularity, the raw fruit is forbidden from some establishments such as hotels, subways and airports, including public transportation in Southeast Asia.”

Lovely.

I grew up eating the fresh durian during the summers that we’d go back to Hong Kong, so it’s something that my family has always loved. To me, it’s creamy, luscious, custardy. I would choose durian over the finest cheese. In fact, it’s so creamy that I’ve used durian as a “cheese” to spread on crackers!

MARK MY WORDS: I think durian is going to be next big good-for-you-make-millions multi level marketing thing, like mangosteen and acai. Can you imagine if some company claimed that durian is the “Asian secret” to eternally youthful skin? And you have to smear this durian stuff on your face nightly as a mask?

Yeah, I’d be lickin’ that mask right off. (ewww. I know. I disgust you!)

Durian Virgin? Come to Mama…

Ok, so if you’re a durian virgin, I’ve got a very, very tame recipe for you.

While fresh durian is hard to find outside of metro cities with a large Asian markets, frozen durian is pretty good. The durian fruit is frozen at its peak of ripeness, but will lack the pungent aroma and taste of fresh durian, which is a really good thing if you have asshole neighbors, which thankfully, I don’t anymore (no, not you Lisa!)

Ask your Asian grocer if they carry frozen durian. If they do not, beg, plead and bribe them until they succumb to the durian love fest.

Making frozen yogurt with the durian was absolutely perfect. The yogurt is tangy, smooth and refreshing - a perfect pairing for a fruit that is considered a “heat” fruit, meaning the fruit has heating properties vs. the usual cooling properties of fruit. Ok, will go into that whole cooling/heating foods thing in another post.

Frozen Durian from Thailand

Defrosted durian looks like this. Not so bad, right? There are several large brown seeds inside the fruit.

***

Durian Frozen Yogurt

16 ounces Greek yogurt or 32 ounces whole milk yogurt
4 ounces frozen durian fruit
1/2 cup sugar

If you are using whole milk yogurt (and not the Greek yogurt), you’ll need to strain out the water (whey). Line your fine meshed sieve with a double-layer of cheesecloth. Spoon the yogurt in, and let it sit propped over a deep bowl in the refrigerator for at least four hours. Discard the whey (water.) If you are using Greek-style yogurt, no need to strain, just use as is.

Use your hands to scoop out and discard the large seeds. The durian should be soft enough at room temperature to use a potato masher or whisk to smush and break up the durian. In a bowl, mix the yogurt, durian and sugar together. Taste and if add more durian if it’s not durian-y enough for you! Refrigerate for 1 hour or overnight.

Following the your ice cream maker’s insturctions, churn, baby, churn the durian yogurt until the mixture is the consistency of soft ice cream.

***

Who else loves durian?

Chez Pim makes Sweet Sticky Rice with Durian and Coconut Milk Sauce

Malaysia’s Best loves Durian Butter Cake

Wokking Mum whipped up a batch of Durian Cupcakes

how about you? Have you ever had Durian?

***

Only 1 day left to enter!

Come enter to win a Flip Video Ultra camcorder!!!!

It’s Chinese Wonton Noodle Soup time! A great dish to make for the Beijing 2008 Olympics! This is recipe 5 in the series (see links at the end for the other recipes)

***

Wrapping Wontons Videos

I’ve got two for you - I was on CBS on Tuesday - this was a BLAST! A 4 minute cooking segment in not in a kitchen…here’s the video:
(link is right above photo when you get to CBS site)

And my regular segment on ABC7  Chinese Wonton Noodle Soup  just click on the “featured video” right below the recipe name. And yes, I flubbed saying the number eight in Mandarin! It’s “baa” not “baat” (which is how I say it in Cantonese).

***

Wonton Noodle Soup Recipe

I love making wontons with my kids! Gather your guests in the kitchen and have them help you fold the wontons. The key to making wontons is to not overfill the dumpling and to make sure that the wonton is sealed tight.

Wonton Wrappers

The wrappers come frozen - just defrost in refrigerator overnight or on the counter for 40 minutes. Do not soak in water or defrost in microwave. Once the package is opened, it’s important to always keep them covered under a damp towel, as the edges will dry out, making it very difficult to work with.

Freezing Wontons

If you’d like to freeze wontons (great idea for super easy quick meal) - lay the wrapped wontons in a single layer. Freeze and when frozen, gather them up and place them in a freezer bag. If you don’t freeze them in single layer, you’ll end up with a big, massive clump of wontons and you’ll have trouble prying them apart.

To cook frozen wonton, the instructions are exactly the same. Put them in the boiling broth FROZEN. Do not defrost. The timing will be longer BUT - that’s the beauty of my cooking method.

Boiling Wontons

Put away your timer! Let me explain. I’m sure you’re used to watching the clock when boiling pasta. Instead of watching the clock, I’m having you do this Chinese style. Boil your pot of soup. Add dumplings. When it comes to a boil, add 1 cup of room temp broth. When that comes to a boil, add another cup. When boiling again, it’s done. So if you’re adding FROZEN wontons, 10 wontons or 50 wontons, the water will come to a boil as it’s ready - thus it’s sort of self-timing.

Adding broth a little at a time like this prevents your delicate wontons from breaking and bursting in rapid, hard boiling water. So how many wontons to cook at a time? Well - that depends on how big your pot is, how much soup you have.

For the Wonton Noodle Soup recipe below, I’d cook them in 3 separate batches - so that you don’t crowd the wontons.

Serves 4

1/2 pound ground pork
2 stalks scallion, finely minced
1 tablespoons soy sauce
1 teaspoons rice vinegar
1 teaspoons cornstarch
1/4 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon sesame oil
1/2 pound wonton wrappers, at room temperature, covered with a damp towel
1 tablespoon cornstarch + 1/4 cup cool water (cornstarch slurry)
2 quarts chicken broth
8 ounces dried wonton noodles (or thin, egg noodles)
1/2 pound bok choy, leaves separated and washed well
1 teaspoon sesame oil
chili garlic sauce (optional)

In a large bowl, combine the pork, scallion, soy sauce, rice vinegar, cornstarch, sugar and sesame oil. Mix well. Put a scant teaspoon of filling in the middle of a wonton wrapper, brush cornstarch slurry on all edges. Fold over to form a triangle, press to secure edges, encasing the filling. Brush cornstarch slurry on one tip of the triangle. Bring two corners together and press to secure (though my kids often just leave them as triangles.) Place on clean, dry plate in one layer and cover loosely with plastic wrap to prevent drying. Repeat with remaining.

In a large stockpot, add all but 2 cups of the broth and bring to a boil. The 2 cups of reserved broth should be room temperature or just slightly chilled. Turn the heat to medium-high and add the wontons. Bring pot back to a gentle boil. When it reaches a boil, add 1 cup of the reserved broth. Bring back to a boil and again, add the remaining 1 cup of reserved broth.

Keep the heat on the pot on (you still need to cook the noodles and bok choy) while using a spider or sieve to scoop up the wontons and distribute amongst the bowls. Cook the noodles in the pot according to the package instructions. Add the bok choy to the pot during last minute of cooking noodles and let simmer, until cooked through. Ladle broth, noodles and bok choy to bowls. Drizzle just a few drops of sesame oil in each bowl.

Serve with chili garlic sauce if desired.
***
Other great recipes!

Ground Beef with Beijing Sauce Over Noodles

Stir Fried Shrimp, Eggs and Peas + Stir Fry Secrets

Pan Fried Shrimp and Pork Potstickers

Xiao Long Bao - Steamed Shanghai Soup Dumplings

]]> http://steamykitchen.com/blog/2008/08/04/wonton-noodle-soup/feed/ http://steamykitchen.com/blog/2008/07/27/potstickers/ http://steamykitchen.com/blog/2008/07/27/potstickers/#comments Sun, 27 Jul 2008 14:12:20 +0000 SteamyKitchen http://steamykitchen.com/blog/?p=718

Cooking Chinese for the Olympics!
This is Recipe 3 in the series and another home-style Chinese dish for you to try (see below for the rest)

***

My friend, Lynne, is an assistant at The Rolling Pin, the cooking school where I teach in Florida. She’s often free in the evenings to work at the school, since her husband, Kevin, has been serving in Kuwait for the past 11 months. Assisting in the classes are fun for Lynne and it keeps her busy during the otherwise lonely evenings.

Normally, for my classes, I have 15 students, as that is just the right number of students that can fit into the studio kitchen. With hands-on classes, it can get pretty intense for me, as I need to totally be on top of everything from working with each student individually, demonstrating new techniques, explaining how to use Asian ingredients, ensuring that students don’t hurt themselves with the 22 or so super-sharp knives in the kitchen, and of course keeping an eye on the food so that we can all enjoy a wonderful meal! I would probably call myself an orchestrator of sorts, some evenings wishing that I had another set of eyes mounted to the back of my head to coordinate and keep track of it all.

A couple of weeks ago during one of my classes, smack dab in the middle of the first course, Chef Dave, the owner of the cooking school, yells over to me, “We have another student who’d like to join the class. Can you fit him in?”

I was in midst of showing a student how to properly handle a chef’s knife and didn’t even look up to reply, “Of course we can fit another in!” There’s always room for one more. Please just excuse the little steam escaping from the tippy top of my head as I quickly reassign, recalculate, reassess and re-whatever to balance the class to fit in one more student without upsetting the delicate scale of controlled chaos.

As I glanced over to welcome the new addition, my jaw dropped:

It was Lynne’s husband who just flew in from Kuwait to surprise her.

I’m tearing up as I write this because it was one of the most heartfelt moments to watch the lovebirds embrace and reunite. Kevin took off his fatigues and we handed him an apron. He jumped right into class and started pleating dumplings with us. It was so cute to watch the sweethearts steal kisses, glances, and giggles throughout class.

***

How to pleat potsticker dumplings

I’m piecing together several photos of dumpling making from different cooking sessions, so you’ll have to excuse the inconsistent photo quality. Not to mention, these photos were from last year, before I learned how to use my camera’s basic fuction, like FOCUS. 

These photos were taken when I handmade the dumpling wrapper - a feat that while delicious - to me is not worth the trouble, which is why I’ve not posted this before! The handmade wrappers are thicker than what you’d buy at the store.

Spoon about 1 teaspsoon of filling in the middle of the wrapper. Use your finger to brush the cornstarch slurry all around the outer edge of the dumpling to act as your “glue” to hold dumpling together.

Bring up opposite sides and pinch the dumpling wrapper in the middle.

You’ll only be pleating the upper half of the dumpling. In this photo, all my pleats will be made on the upper half.

Start with your right side. Hold the dumpling in your hand. Fold and pleat as shown above. You’ll do 3 pleats just like this on the right side. Then repeat on the other side, but in the opposite direction, so that all your pleats are pointing towards the center. See how my pleat points towards the center? This creates a crescent effect. The next time I make dumplings, I’ll have to take a few more photos, because it’s easier to learn by photos than in words.

Pinch all pleats tight - there should be no open spaces, otherwise your filling will fall out.

Now fry them (read my instructions below in the recipe)

Sidenote:

While my recipe below does not call for cabbage, if you do want to include cabbage in your dumpling, make sure you salt the cabbage, let it sit for 15 minutes and squeeze all the water out of the cabbage. Watery cabbage = soggy dumplings. Look how much water comes out after 15 minutes of salting:

The salt draws out the water. For every handful of shredded cabbage, use about 1 teaspoon of kosher salt (1/2 tsp table salt), mix well, let sit for 15 minutes at room temp. Place salted cabbage in cheesecloth and squeeze water out. You could also just do this in your hands too, if you don’t have cheesecloth.

Pan Fried Shrimp and Pork Potstickers

Serves 6-8

1 package of frozen dumpling skins, defrosted overnight in refrigerator or 40 minutes room temp (do not microwave or set in water)
3/4 pound raw shrimp, shelled and deveined
3 stalks green onions, cut into 2 inch sections
1/2 cup canned bamboo shoots
1/2 pound ground pork
2 tablespoons soy sauce
1/2 teaspoon kosher salt
2 tablespoons cornstarch
1 teaspoon freshly grated ginger
1 tablespoon rice wine (or dry sherry)
for the slurry: 1 tablespoon cornstarch mixed with 1/4 cup water in a small bowl
water
cooking oil

Dipping Sauce
1 teaspoon Asian chili sauce
1/4 cup soy sauce
2 teaspoon sesame oil
1/2 teaspoon sugar
1/2 teaspoon rice wine vinegar

Wash the shrimp and pat very dry. In a food processor, add the shrimp, green onions, bamboo shoots and pulse several times until the shrimp is chopped to about 1/4 inch. In a large bowl, combine the shrimp mixture with ground pork, soy sauce, salt, cornstarch, ginger, rice wine. Mix well.

Spoon 1 teaspoon of the filling onto dumpling skin. Brush a bit of the cornstarch slurry
all around the edge of the dumpling skin. Fold over and press to secure edges. Make sure edges are sealed tightly. Shape the dumpling so that it has a flat bottom. Cover loosely with plastic wrap so that it doesn’t dry out.

When you are ready to cook, heat a large nonstick pan with 1 tablespoon of cooking oil over medium-high heat. When the oil is hot but not smoking, add the dumplings, flat side down, not touching, to the pan. Let fry for 1 minute until the bottoms are light golden brown. Pour 1/4 cup of water into the pan and immediately cover with a tight fitting lid. Turn heat to medium and let the dumplings steam for 3minutes. Open lid and let the remaining liquid cook off about 1 minute. Cut into a dumpling to make sure that the filling is cooked through. Remove to plate, wipe the pan clean with paper towels (or wash) and repeat with remaining dumplings. Serve with dipping sauce.

***

Still hungry?

Chinese Pastries with Hoisin Chicken

Con Your Kids to Eat Vegetables, Steamy-Style

Ground Beef with Beijing Sauce Over Noodles

Stir Fried Shrimp, Eggs and Peas + Stir Fry Secrets

Xiao Long Bao - Steamed Shanghai Soup Dumplings

Wonton Noodle Soup

My editor, Jeff Houck, sent over a picture of pan-fried Scrapple slice and my heart fluttered like crazy. “Scrapple? Scrapple! What’s Scrapple? I asked him,” and within 30 minutes was off to the supermarket to find Scrapple, a distant cousin to Spam.

Yes, I have an odd fascination with meat that comes in it’s own coffin.

“hmmm…I wonder if I could showcase the otherwise disgusting “meat” in a edgy, fashion-y, Bon Appetit-esque yet appetizinng way. I mean, when was the last time you saw a photo of canned ham and said, “DAMN…that’s a mighty fine piece of ass?!”

While I was there, I went bezerk and ended up with a basketful of “meat” products along with a variety of ingredients to concoct four different recipes. And really. That’s how my “meat” adventure began.

***

Scrapple Fried Rice with Fresh Chilies and Garlic

Hello world, meet Scrapple, a product that when fried with nothing else, tastes just like the name sounds, scrappy offal. If you must know what scrapple is made of, Wikipedia paints a pretty picture:

Scrapple is typically made of hog offal, such as the head, heart, liver, and other scraps, which are boiled with any bones attached (often the entire head), to make a broth. Once cooked, bones and fat are discarded, the meat is reserved, and (dry) cornmeal is boiled in the broth to make a mush. The meat, finely minced, is returned, and seasonings, typically sage, thyme, savory, and others are added. The mush is cast into loaves and allowed to cool thoroughly until gelled.

I don’t know about you, but thank goodness for sage, thyme and savory. The thought of jellied pig snout without those herbs just sends shivers throughout my frail, virgin body.

My main strategy when developing this recipe, was really, “how the hell do I transform something so udderly disgusting into a flavorful fried rice that even the pickiest eater would enjoy (as long as I didn’t let on what scrapple was.)

I chose 3 of the most pungent Asian ingredients that I had on hand: fresh chilies, fish sauce and garlic. Now, I know some of you would say that fish sauce sounds just as disgusting as scrapple, since basically a vat of stinky, fermented fish. But it’s a Southeast Asian staple and I’m being SO hypocritical right now. But did you know that your beloved Worcestershire sauce also contains a version of fish sauce? Dude. I KNOW! If only the makers of scrapple had marketing smarts too - and named their product something a little appealing than horse shit.

Because scrapple contains cornmeal, it crumbles pretty easily when fried, so I treated it like ground beef. First, I cut the scrapple into small cubes and stir fried it, using my spatula to break it up even further.

Scrapple Fried Rice with Fresh Chilies and Garlic

serves 2

1 1/2 tablespoons cooking oil, divided
1 teaspoon finely minced garlic
1 stalk scallion, minced
1 thinly sliced fresh chili (like Thai bird’s eye or jalepeno)
1/2 cup chopped scrapple
2 cups cooked, leftover rice (grains separated with a fork)
3/4 teaspoon fish sauce (substitute with 1 to 2 tsp soy sauce)
freshly ground black pepper

In a wok or large saute pan, heat just 1 tablespoon of the cooking oil over high heat. When the oil is very hot, add the scrapple and fry until browned, about 1 minute. Push the scrapple towards the outer edges of the wok, clearing a space in the middle to fry the aromatics. Turn the heat to medium, add the remaining 1/2 tablespoon of cooking oil and immediately add the garlic, scallion and fresh chilies. Stir fry for 15 seconds, until you can smell the fragrance of the aromatics. Turn your heat to high and add the rice. Use your spatula to mix all the ingredients thoroughly and at the same time spreading the rice and ingredients to use as much of the cooking surface of the wok as possible.

Now just leave it alone for 30 seconds. Don’t stir, poke or prod. Let the rice grains heat up, which basically will re-steam the rice. Once the rice has heated up, use your spatula to stir and flip the mixture. Pour the fish sauce slowly around the outer edges of the wok - the heat of the wok will help evaporate the fish sauce as it moves down the sides. Stir and flip the rice well again, to mix the fish sauce throughout. Season with black pepper. Let rice continue to cook until each of rice grain is hot.

***

Spam Fried Rice with Pineapple

Wow, what a voluptuous fan of Spam! Spread it all out, hot stuff!

This was a no-brainer…I’ve previously have professed my love for Spam, in the Ode to Spam in the Style of Seuss, and I wanted to create a simpler, more refreshing version of Spam Fried Rice. My recipe calls for canned pineapple - but of course, you can use fresh pineapple, but hey…we’re going with the whole canned and processed theme here.

Spam Fried Rice

serves 2

2 teaspoons cooking oil
1/2 cup diced spam
1 teaspoon grated fresh ginger
1 stalk scallion, minced
1/4 cup crushed or 1/8 inch diced pineapple (canned or fresh)
2 cups cooked, leftover rice (grains separated)
1 to 2 teaspoons soy sauce
1/2 teaspoon sesame oil

In a wok or large saute pan, heat the cooking oil over medium-high heat. When the oil is hot but not smoking, add the diced spam and fry until browned on all sides, about 1 minute. Push the spam towards the outer edges of the wok, clearing a space in the middle to fry. You should still have a bit of oil left that is pooled in the middle of the wok. Turn the heat to low, add the  add the ginger, scallions and pineapple. Stir fry for 15 seconds, until fragrant. Turn your heat to high and immediately add the rice. Use your spatula to mix all the ingredients thoroughly and at the same time spreading the rice and ingredients to use as much of the cooking surface of the wok as possible.

Now just leave it alone for 30 seconds. Don’t stir, poke or prod. Let the rice grains heat up, which basically will re-steam the rice. Once the rice has heated up, use your spatula to stir and flip the mixture. Pour the soy sauce sauce slowly around the outer edges of the wok - the heat of the wok will help evaporate the soy sauce as it moves down the sides. Stir and flip the rice well again, to mix the ingredients throughout. Finish with sesame oil and stir well. Let rice continue to cook until each of rice grain is hot.

***

Pork Roll Fried Rice with Shitake Mushrooms and Red Bell Pepper

“Come ‘on, baby, look sexy for the camera….WORK IT!….Twirl and look over your shoulder now!…..YEAH BABY”

I had no idea there was such a thing as Pork Roll until I went shopping for Scrapple! The meat manager actually went around the store with me, helping find the scrapple (frozen section) and then also brought me to the refrigerated bacon and sausage section to hand me a package of Pork Roll. Four slices come per package, and it’s used in a regional specialty called “The Jersey Breakfast” - fried pork roll, egg and cheese sandwich. If you’re not lucky enough to find Pork Roll at your market, substitute with that strange oval-ish shaped canned ham. But then you’d have to buy that big can and only use a half cup diced. I have no idea how to eat that stuff outside of fried rice. I guess you could make the Jersey Breakfast sandwiches the next day from leftover canned ham.

Pork roll is basically coursely ground pork shoulder, and to me, is a Gucci-er version of spam. So I had to up the ante and use some fancy ingredients like fresh shitake mushrooms and fresh red bell peppers. Instead of plain ‘ol soy, I used Maggi sauce, a very popular condiment in Asia (even though its origins are Swiss). I’ve seen this seasoning at most major supermarkets and of course Asian markets too. I believe Maggi sauce even has a big cult following including myself!….

We were going for the casually tossed, grunge look for this photoshoot.

Pork Roll Fried Rice with Shitake and Bell Peppers

serves 2

2 teaspoons cooking oil
1/2 cup sliced pork roll
4 fresh shitake mushrooms, thinly sliced
1/2 red bell pepper, thinly sliced
2 cups cooked, leftover rice (grains separated)
1 teaspoon Chinese rice wine
1 teaspoon Maggi sauce (substitute with 1 to 2 teaspoons soy sauce)

In a wok or large saute pan, heat the cooking oil over medium-high heat. When the oil is hot but not smoking, add the pork roll and fry until browned, about 1 minute. Push the pork roll towards the outer edges of the wok, clearing a space in the middle to fry. You should still have a bit of oil left that is pooled in the middle of the wok. Turn the heat to low, add the shitake and bell pepper. Stir fry for 30 seconds, until softened. Turn your heat to high and immediately add the rice. Use your spatula to mix all the ingredients thoroughly and at the same time spreading the rice and ingredients to use as much of the cooking surface of the wok as possible.

Now just leave it alone for 30 seconds. Don’t stir, poke or prod. Let the rice grains heat up, which basically will re-steam the rice. Once the rice has heated up, use your spatula to stir and flip the mixture. Pour the Maggi sauce and the rice wine sauce slowly around the outer edges of the wok - the heat of the wok will help evaporate the sauce as it moves down the sides. Immediately, stir and flip the rice well again, to mix the ingredients throughout. Let rice continue to cook until each of rice grain is hot.

***

Vienna Sausage Fried Rice with Kaffir and Lemongrass

Went for minimalistic architecture - symmetrical, clean, lines. Very sleek and slimming!

I admit to eating an entire can of Vienna Sausages - straight out the can at room temperature. LOVE IT. We used to eat these little turds fried for breakfast in Hong Kong. I thought it would be great to put a Southeast Asian twist to this fried rice - and use thin slivers of lemongrass and torn kaffir lime leaves - both from my garden, but you can find at most Asian markets. If they don’t have fresh lemongrass or kaffir, ask for either in frozen form.

To prepare lemongrass, measure about 4-6 inches from the bottom and cut. Discard the scratchy, long leaves and keep the bottom, white bulb part. Peel off the outermost leaves and use a very sharp chef’s knife to cut paper-thin slivers. If you’re not capable of doing this, grab a microplane grater and just grate the bottom 4 inches of the bulb. It’s a pretty fibrous grass, and if you cut into huge chunks, you’ll end up chewing like a cow. Not so lady-like.

For the Kaffir, take a single leaf and tear in several spaces, stopping at the spine to keep the leaf intact. You won’t actually eat this leaf, but exposing the inner part of the leaf will fragrance your entire dish.

Even the bowl is sleek and slimming!

Vienna Sausage Fried Rice with Kaffir and Lemongrass

3 teaspoons cooking oil, divided
1/2 cup Vienna sausage, each link cut into 4 pieces
1 tablespoon fine rings of lemongrass (see note)
3 kaffir lime leaves, torn in several places to spine
1 tablespoon sliced chilies
2 eggs, beaten
2 cups cooked, leftover rice (grains separated)
1 1/2 teaspoons fish sauce (substitute with 1-2 teaspoons soy sauce)

In a wok or large saute pan, heat just 2 teaspoons of cooking oil over medium-high heat. When the oil is hot but not smoking, add the Vienna sausage and fry until browned, about 1 minute. Push the sausage towards the outer edges of the wok, clearing a space in the middle to fry. You should still have a bit of oil left that is pooled in the middle of the wok. Turn the heat to low, add the lemongrass, kaffir leaves and chilies. . Stir fry for 30 seconds, until fragrant.

Now push those aromatics up to the sides of the wok to clear space again in the middle. Turn the heat to high and add the remaining 1 teaspoon of cooking oil and let that heat up to hot but not smoking. Add the egg and fry the egg, swirling gently to break up the egg. Cook the egg until firm, about 1 minute.

Add the rice. Use your spatula to mix all the ingredients thoroughly and at the same time spreading the rice and ingredients to use as much of the cooking surface of the wok as possible.

Now just leave it alone for 30 seconds. Don’t stir, poke or prod. Let the rice grains heat up, which basically will re-steam the rice. Once the rice has heated up, use your spatula to stir and flip the mixture. Pour the fish sauce slowly around the outer edges of the wok - the heat of the wok will help evaporate the sauce as it moves down the sides. Immediately, stir and flip the rice well again, to mix the ingredients throughout. Let rice continue to cook until each of rice grain is hot.

***
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I just read an article about a man in India who created a tree that grows 300 varieties of mangoes.

Although the original tree is more than 80 years old, this man has grafted different mango saplings onto it. It’s kind of neat and strange at the same time.

But, it got me thinking: If I could have one tree in my backyard that could grow 300 varieties of something, what would I want? Three hundred is a big number, and I’d probably get tired of that one thing - even if it were chocolate: dark, milk, semisweet, truffle, bittersweet, cordial-filled, pistachio-topped, caramel-injected, syrup, frosting, nibs, bacon-flavored, powdered, and on and on.

For the first two weeks, I would be in chocolate nirvana, a constant state of bliss. But there is a fine line between swimming in chocolaty indulgence and waking up one morning with a massive, head-pounding hangover and wishing that someone - please, anyone - would grab a turkey bulb baster and suck that sugar out of my bloodstream. I call that killing me softly with cocoa.

No, I think I’d ask for a tree that grew more than just one thing. Maybe a salad tree? Radicchio, romaine, celery, fat croutons, fancy olives, shaved Parmesan, real bacon bits.

I could even go for a Bern’s Steakhouse appetizer tree: a selection of expensive caviars, lump crab cakes, shrimp cocktail, black truffle steak tartare, charcoal-grilled chicken skewers - all ripe for plucking. I guess their dessert bar growing from the back of the tree wouldn’t be bad, either.

But honestly, I think the tree that I would choose would be the frozen fruit daiquiri tree: blackberries, limes, lemons, strawberries, passion fruit, raspberries and a little spout on the trunk that dispenses aged rum on tap. Oh, yes, can I get the deluxe model that comes with a scantily dressed cabana boy to serve me drinks and do laundry?

Husband just chimed in for his request: Can the cabana boy also recaulk the kitchen because that really needs to get done this week. This is probably the only time in my life my husband and I are daydreaming about the same cabana boy - and I’m not freaking out.

Well, if you’re big into variety, and I don’t mean 300 mutations of the same fruit, I know you’ll like this recipe. The fruit salsa is flexible - use whatever fruit you like or what’s on sale. Actually, I think pineapple and blueberries would be great in the salsa. And shrimp? If you don’t like shrimp, substitute with large, dry-packed scallops, chicken strips or thin-sliced sirloin. Instead of carrots and cucumbers, serve with matchstick-cut zucchini, radishes or cooked edamame pods.

There’s one thing that you do have to have, and it’s lettuce leaves that can serve as cups. Boston bibb, iceberg and butterhead lettuce all work great. But wait - I guess if you’re not into cutesy cups, grab any type of lettuce and just make this into a salad!

p.s. If you think I cut those perfect carrots by hand, NOPE! I used the Oxo Julienne Tool $5.99 - totally indispensable in my kitchen and I can julienne an entire carrot or cucumber in 20 seconds:

Grilled Shrimp Lettuce Cups with Tropical Fruit Salsa

1 pound shrimp, shelled and deveined
2 teaspoons soy sauce
1 teaspoon freshly grated orange zest
1/2 teaspoon ground coriander
1/2 teaspoon chili powder
1/2 teaspoon sesame oil
Bamboo skewers, soaked in water for 30 minutes
1 cup julienned carrots
1 cup julienned cucumbers
1 head iceberg, butterhead or Boston bibb lettuce, leaves separated into “cups”
Sriracha hot sauce (or any hot chili sauce)
Tropical Fruit Salsa (recipe below)

Marinate shrimp in soy, orange zest, coriander, chili powder and sesame oil for 15 minutes. Skewer the shrimp on bamboo skewers. Grill shrimp on medium-high, direct heat about 2 minutes on each side or until cooked through. Serve with Fruit Salsa (see below), carrots, cucumber, lettuce cups and hot sauce.

Makes 4 servings.

From Steamy Kitchen food column in Tampa Tribune

Tropical Fruit Salsa

1 cup diced mango
1 cup diced papaya
1/2 cup diced kiwi
Pinch of chili powder
1/4 teaspoon kosher or sea salt, or to taste
Freshly ground black pepper

Combine ingredients and set aside until ready to use.