My dear friends, I have a nice little gift for you.

::tap dancing with excitement!!::

A few weeks ago, I ordered my yearly supply of Saffron from my fav supplier. I wrote to them, asking if they be willing to donate some saffron for a contest that I wanted to hold - and they generously said, “YES!”

I’m not talking about a few wispy threads in a teeny tiny jar the size of my thumb. I’m talking about a mountain of saffron so big that you’ll giggle and squeal with delight.

Just so you know, I’m NOT getting paid to promote their stuff - I contacted them with the idea of a random drawing.

Let’s talk about saffron for just a bit. If you aren’t familiar with how saffron is graded or how to judge good saffron from the crappy stuff - here’s a little lesson.

What is the stuff and why is it so *(&#!!&*$%% expensive?

Saffron is known as the world’s most expensive spice. It is the stigma from a Crocus flower. Each flower produces 3 saffron threads, which must be harvested delicately by hand and dried. Itakes over 13,000 threads to make one ounce!!! My photo above is one ounce of saffron. <–photo from Wiki

Crocus Sex 101 The top part of the stigma (above the dotted line) is the “saffron” - this is the only part of the thread that has flavor and intense color. These are the goods.

The bottom part (below the dotted line) is the shitty stuff, called the style. It has virtually no culinary value - being aromaless, tasteless and gives no color to your dish. Some evil saffron sellers will try to package the entire thread as “saffron.”  Bastards.

So, to judge quality of saffron, you can just simply look at the color of the threads and see if you have a lot of the shitty style part attached. Of all places that I get my saffron, the most consistent quality + best prices have been with Saffron.com, which is based in San Francisco. (hey, you San Franciscan’s out there - give me your input on this company…have you purchased from them before and do you know anything about the company?)

To use saffron, you first soak a pinch of threads in a couple tablespoons of warm water to release its flavors, color and aroma. When the recipe calls for the saffron to be added, just add the threads + water to the dish.

The contest details are at the end of this post….keep reading!

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But first….a little laugh…

As I mentioned in my last post, our house is usually stocked with good, wholesome breakfast foods. Because running around the playground and singing, "Itsy Bitsy Spider" requires quite a bit of energy. A good breakfast is essential to becoming the superstar student, outrunning the bullies and beating up the rugrats.

We always have mini whole wheat bagels by Pepperidge Farms at the house. Usually, the kids love a bit of cream cheese and some fruit to top.

This particular morning a few months ago, Andrew asked for the the bagel, plain. He just wanted to eat it as-is, whole. As I handed him a warmed mini-bagel, this little 4-year old wiggle-master examined the bagel.

        Looked at it from the front. 
        Looked at it from the back.
        Curiously peeked throught the hole.

and then proudly proclaimed to me,
"LOOK MA MA!!!  I’m gonna eat a BUTT-HOLE!!!"

Smart-ass

So deviant, yet right-on.

But…concerning to me…how does he know what a butt-hole looks like?!? It’s not like we randomly run into butt-holes in his nursery rhyme books, Disney channel or at the park.

Oh. But wait. He must have remembered the time we walked by a construction zone and 2 workers snickered lewd things to me in Spanish. That’s when covered Andrew’s ears and I shot back with, "!@#! off and go shove your hammer up your asscrack." And I think he did.

BTW, don’t judge my parenting skills based on his uncoordinated pajama set. He dressed himself.

***

What Shall I Cook on TV in 2 Weeks?

Ok, on to the fun part of this post. As you know, I showed my face to the world on television last month, cooking live on our local ABC station. My next performance is October 9th. I’d love to promote the world of food blogging, so I’ve decided to cook a dish from one of you!! Will you help me choose?

Voting on the next page!

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