Earlier this year, I wanted to change up SteamyKitchen.com’s site design and structure. The current design has served me quite well, but I wanted more features, and let’s face it, given the choice of “same” or “more bling” you know which I’d rear end in a heartbeat.
But the only technical thing I’m good at is the three-finger-salute, Ctrl-Alt-Del. The move is used so often that it’s implanted in my autonomic nervous system, etching a fat path with sparkly pink synapses. Just this past weekend at the grocery store, I had an altercation with an old, crinkly bastard who apparently forgot to pluck his golf club out of his ass before he stepped off the green and yelled at me for my grocery cart that came within 2 millimeters from his precious blue Volvo convertible. After walking away and cussing under my breath, my fingers automatically went into position and from a distance, I held my hands up and Ctrl-Alt-Deleted his 2-inch forehead. It’s a powerful gesture, one that stops Windows dead in its tracks and also gives me the satisfaction of cursing him from afar. So what if I look dumb, I don’t care.
For the site, customizing fonts and colors were a piece of cake, but changing column widths was like trying to move the Statue of Liberty with a salad fork and cheese grater.
Do you know what HTML stands for? Hyperactive Total Mental Leakage. Oh yeah. And cascading style sheets, or CSS? That’s the sound of my precious brain cells seeping out of my head during moments of spontaneous HTML.
This is worse than learning a new language! At least if I’m flubbing in Spanish, I can supplement with hand gestures. In code-speak, if you’re missing one little tiny “:” the site just shrugs its shoulders, says,
DOES NOT COMPUTE, and heads back to the server for a nap.
Finally, last Friday, after countless hours of coding, testing, tweaking and head banging, I was ready to launch. I announced aloud to my friends that I was going to click this little button, chimes will sound and magically, all the electronic impulses in the universe would align and “poof!” Steamy Kitchen would unveil its new facelift. I held my breath, shut one eye and clicked.
“Dammit! I thought you loved me. Say something! Tell me what you want. Our relationship is so much stronger than a colon.” But still, no response. I should have included a line item for “therapist” in my design budget.
I was so sick of the computer, that for dinner options, I reached for a cookbook instead of searching through my bookmarks. This recipe for Roasted Garlic Killer Shrimp is one that I adapted from a cookbook called,
Crab cookbook co-authored by my friend, Jennifer Jeffrey. The other author, you ask? None other than the famous Andrea Froncillo, exec chef of The Stinking Rose, a garlic restaurant in San Francisco and Beverly Hills. I modified the recipe by using shrimp instead of crab because I live in a far, far away place that even though surrounded three sides by really deep water, I have absolutely no access to fresh, live crab. Sigh.
This is a “soft” launch of the new site design. What does “soft” mean? It means It means I’m still tweaking the site design and structure. So if you happen to come along knocking on my blog and see me in my underwear painting, hammering and leaking brain cells, you’ll understand. It also means if I f’ up, leave a “:” out of the code and break the site, you’ll also understand, right?!
I can broked new dezign…
Servings: 4 as part of multicourse meal
Preheat oven to 375F.
If you are using extra large shrimp, you can butterfly them, keeping them in the shell, like I did in the photo. Otherwise, leave them whole in the shell. Wash and carefully cut through shell to devein the shrimp while leaving the shell on. The easiest way to do this is with sharp, pointy kitchen shears. Just cut through the back. Heat olive oil and butter in large oven-proof skillet over medium-high heat. When hot but not smoking, add the shallots, garlic, rosemary, red pepper and thyme. Fry until fragrant. Add wine, salt, pepper. When boiling, turn heat off and toss in the shrimp. Send it off to the oven for 7-10 minutes, or until shrimp is cooked through. Timing will depend on the size of shrimp, check after 7 minutes. Garnish with sea salt, chopped parsley. Serve with bread to soak up the juices.
Jennifer and Andrea have generously given me 5 signed cookbooks to give away! To enter, just comment below and mention your favorite way to have crab. That’s it! So simple. I’ll draw 5 names on Tuesday December 18th at 11pm.
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