Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake

Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake

I know…you’re all wondering….

What an elegant dessert….
a souffle, perhaps?
molten chocolate center?
did it take hours to make?

I am pleased to present to you, my Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake.  Never before in the history of desserts has there ever been such an luscious cake that is this good for your inner chocoholic self.

Yes. you heard me right. Not just “low fat” “low calorie” or even “no calorie”

Its NEGATIVE CALORIE.  Meaning, you earn credits for eating this dessert.

So, what makes this cake negative calorie?  Well first off, I made it with:

and replace the 1/2 cup of oil with this:

and nuke for 5 minutes in one of these:

WTF?!?!?  How dare she post a recipe on a food blog using Betty Crocker and a microwave?!?  Isn’t she violating section 4.6.2 of the Food Blog Code of Conduct? 

So, smack me silly with a violation, but I know that one night this week…oh…right around 9:00pm….when no one is watching…you are going to try this cake.  You’re asking yourself if this Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake from Betty C. tastes as delicious, luscious, moist and rich as it looks. Here’s your answer:

Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake

But..but…but….how do you get negative calories with that???


Ok. brace yourselves.  Try to follow along now:

Betty Crocker Calories per serving 280
Replace the oil with a banana -40
Saving oven energy and using microwave instead -86
Saving time (10 minutes in micro vs. 40 in the oven) -43
Not having to look up a fancy recipe -05
For using up the ripe smushy banana – instead of tossing it -32
For not having to use your electric mixer – mixing by hand burns calories -47
For pleasing your inner “Instant Grat-Brat” (I want cake NOW!) -10
For being so clever – who else would combine BettyC+banana+micro ? -23
For using something very healthy and full of antioxidants (reduced Pomegranate Juice) -28
For…um….just because I said so -8
Grand Total -32

Can you see me on late-night infomercials pushing my Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake Diet???

Move over Atkins…here comes something steamy-er….

In case you don’t have ramekins, just pour in a 9×11-ish glass Pyrex pan (something microwave safe please) until batter reaches half way up the sides.  Microwave for 11 minutes medium-high, check for doneness. Cut into nice squares and enjoy.

Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake


Negative Calorie Chocolate Cake

Servings: 8 Prep Time: 3 minutes Cook Time: 5-8 minutes
Screen Shot 2014-02-19 at 12.42.35 PM

I always make this with Betty Crocker Super Moist Cake Mix Dark Chocolate (the one with a Hershey's logo on it). I'm sure it will taste just as good with other brands of cake mix, but this is my preference. The ingredients below are based on the back of the box (with the exception of the banana) If you use a different brand of cake mix, follow their instructions for ingredients, replacing the banana for the oil or butter. Of course, if you aren't on a diet - ditch the banana idea and just use the oil/butter as the recipe calls for.

Note on the banana: It should be a super-ripe brownish in the photo above. If you don't have a super ripe banana and can't wait - just use the oil/butter...the recipe just won't work well with a firm, yellow banana.

Note on the microwave times: Each microwave is different. Use the times I have below and test with toothpick. Just note your final time so that you won't have to check for doneness next time.


1 box Betty Crocker SuperMoist Cake Mix (Dark Chocolate) - or your fav cake mix
1 very ripe banana, smushed well with a fork
3 eggs
1 1/3 cups water
Cooking spray to spray the ramekins


In big bowl:  Smushed banana + eggs + water (whisk well)
Stir in cake mix (Stir vigorously for a couple of minutes until well mixed)
Pour into ramekins (sprayed lightly with cooking spray) until filled 2/3 full

Every microwave is different - here are some guidelines:
For 2 ramekins:  microwave on MEDIUM-HIGH (I set my microwave on power strength 8 ) for 5 minutes
For 3-4 ramekins:  6 minutes
For 5-6 ramekins:  7 minutes

Check with toothpick to see if cake is done.  Mushy cake mix stuck to toothpick? Add another 30 seconds.  Cake crumbs on toothpick? Done.

If you'd like, top with warm chocolate sauce and maybe a little drizzle of reduced pomegranate juice:

Reduced Pomegranate Sauce

Other ideas that I haven’t tried yet:
-drop a big chunk-o-chocolate in the middle of batter in each ramekin (will it turn into a molten chocolate cake?)
-add raspberries to batter
-applesauce instead of banana? Reader Renee suggested adding 1T oil to applesauce to keep moist

Did not load Widget Area 5

Comments 206

  1. Alice

    Yeah, I thought it was funny until I read those rude comments. I was also a bit disappointed because I was searching to see if there was a no calorie cake. I’ve recently come across 0 calorie butter spray and I just love it, so I’m eager to find other minimal cal alternatives. And yeah, someone could eat a tiny piece of cake or no cake at all, but that’s hardy the point. If you love chocolate and cake, you’re trying to find a healthy option. I don’t like the idea of completely restricting your favorite foods.

  2. marge

    The best part is the microwave.. especially because right now my kitchen is out of commission because I just moved.

    I also enjoyed the older comments, its a shame people missed the joke, but its sad when they didn’t and still felt the urge to lash out via rude posts.

    I’m sure they’re probably just bitter because you’re recipe is so sweet


  3. teresa yanez

    ERMMM, alice you do realize there is nothing that is truly no calories right? even that butter spray you love, after a few seconds of spraying it goes from 4 calories and keeps going up. i once measured the butter pray by weighing what i spray and it ended up being a lot of calories and not zero….. by the way ive read it only expending 5 calories per hour for the body to digest so the negative calorie thing is just a myth. by the way, a company can put zero calories if something is >5 calories. it might not sound like a lot, but if you start inhaling something thinking its low calorie, u will end up hurting yourself.

  4. teresa yanez

    this recipe is extremely misleading, the cake mix itself has calories and whatever else you add to it, like the banana will start adding on calories too. where is the negative calories (not that that even exists) part of this recipe? it might be lower in calorie than the average cake but certainly not zero calorie, dont mislead people into thinking its okay to stuff themselves with this cake and expect to lose weight

    1. Lynn

      DO YOU NOT HAVE A SENSE OF HUMOUR? Plus, you would have to be an idiot not to realise everything has calories!! Lighten up honey, life’s too short to be so serious…

        1. Tim

          Scientifically speaking: Nope. Even Water has a calorie amount, but its way under one. Thats why its not listed. Apart from that you burn more Calories by drinking water than gaining by doing so.

  5. Denise

    Jaden, I hope you ignore all the stupid people who either have no sense of humor or didn’t read your whole post. I think your recipes are fabulous and the fun way you present them makes me laugh out loud. Please share more of your “negative calorie” recipes with us….even if for no other reason than to piss off all the uptight people out there!!!!

    1. Nina

      Ditto – love your recipe and if someone can’t take a joke……be glad we don’t liv with them lol

  6. sour sweets

    I guess I find the right cake for my mom.Thanks for the share I’m sure she will be happy to know that there is a healthful cake that she can eat.

  7. Meg

    Do you not understand that it was OBVIOUSLY a joke? lol. Just a recipe for an easy chocolate cake…decided to be funny too.

  8. akaisenshi

    Jokes are supposed to be funny. This is just so not funny. Try harder next time please.

  9. metal roller

    Hey I am so happy I found your web site, I really found you by error, while I was researching on Aol for something else, Anyhow I am here now and would just like to say thanks for a marvelous post and a all round entertaining blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have time to look over it all at the minute but I have saved it and also added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a lot more, Please do keep up the superb job.

  10. Pingback: 10 ways to eat chocolate on a low calorie diet | chocolatechap

  11. Maria

    Haha! I knew this would be too good to be true! It looks lovely though. Using a banana as an alternative for certain things is a good idea none-the-less lol.

  12. NegativeCalorieBonBons

    Anyone who read the recipe title and thought it was real is a really “special” person. I mean HELLO it’s chocolate! How could you have a “negative calorie” chocolate anything genius! Relax, have a chuckle, make the cake and then go for a run. Or, if you’re a little “stocky”… What if ,instead of cruising the web for easy ways to lose weight like making negative calorie chocolate cakes, you just get up, eat the banana by itself and go for a run or walk.

  13. Kathy

    I remember going to this website a year ago (the word Negative Calorie is so alluring, lol) and there were comments saying that, “There’s no such thing as negative calorie!” and such.
    It’s sad that people can’t take a joke nowadays. Nothing in this world is negative calorie unless you exercise, eat less calories than that you’ve expended (technically, it’s negative, right?)

    Well, that cake looks amazing and I’m going to make it.

  14. columbia93

    I came upon this recipe while looking for something different to do with a chocolate cake mix. Since I’ve also looked for microwave cakes in the past and not found this, I’m going to subtract another 25 calories just for killing two birds with one stone!!!!!!

    I have to say that I’m feeling ridiculously smart and witty after reading some of the comments on this page….especially the last one (who had NO excuse for not getting it!)

  15. Pingback: Day 032-2 (T, 120201) — Artisan Steak Tasting; Food Diary, Day 3 | New John for a New Year

  16. Pingback: Baked goods recipes low fat – Baked goods recipes | Bakeware Tips » Blog Archive

  17. Laura

    totally agree, not funny at all. she just sounds like a moron who doesn’t understand how calories work.

  18. John

    Man.. Why take the time to write something like this? Not particularly funny, instead misleading, particularly since this page is most likely to be visited by people looking for low calorie recipies.

  19. John

    Dear Alice,
    I am sorry to have to be the one to break the bad news to you but your zero calorie butter spray is a LIE.
    You see the FDA (That wonderful Government Agency that is supposed to have our health in mind) has rules that food producers must follow. A lot of these rules make sense and are there for our protection.
    However like in many large government agencies ‘stupid’ creeps in (usually it creeps in just after a ‘campaign contribution’ you know a legal bribe)
    Back to what I was saying. The rules the FDA have say that a company can claim it food products have 0 fat if there is .5 grams of fat per serving or less. So what companies do is say that the serving size is .5 grams. ABRACADABRA….fat (cooking oil is %100 fat) can now be labeled as FAT FREE !!!!!
    Ant there are other loopholes regarding Trans-fats and calories that companies weezle through to make their products look healthier than they are.
    Read the ingredients list on your food and then do a little research. You might just be surprised at what you are really eating.

  20. MrsD

    Funny! Even better are those posts from people who can’t take a joke!

    I usually substitute applesauce but banana sounds good, too. I’ve also found a sugar free chocolate cake mix by Betty Crocker that is every bit as good as the other kind. (Keeping sugar down for diabetes)

    Lastly – good idea about using ramikins!

  21. Jacki

    My, my people are far too uptight! It IS funny, and just b/c people are too uptight to take it as a joke, doesn’t mean it’s not funny. You can wish on every star imaginable, it’s not going to make ANY cake a no calorie cake or any other thing out there as no calorie. As many have already pointed out anything marked NO, just means that it has less than 1 of something… NO carbs = less than 1 carb per serving, same with fat, and calories. Get enough of those less than one and they add up to a whole lot. Besides, so many people are going overboard on low cal, low fat, low carb. Eat real, unprocessed food more often and you won’t have to worry so much about how much you’re eating.

  22. lapis legit keju

    Measuring cups are an absolute must for baking cakes and cookies.
    Maybe you will find recipes for cakes other in the world.

    The different types of cookware include stainless steel, enameled
    cast iron, enameled over steel, clad aluminum or copper and non-stick which are
    quite popular in homes.

  23. Robert

    Perfect now how bout a negative calorie cheesecake recipe? Perhaps you should take submissions and write a negative calorie cookbook. Probably make the best-seller list in cooking AND humor…


    Handmade jewelry possesses its own charm and when given like a gift, adds enormously towards the sentiment with the gift itself.
    These are some ideas on the best way to incorporate lush peonies into the wedding bouquets and centerpieces.
    Enjoy dinner inside restaurant- Now, if you cannot do hands-on preparation because of
    this day of love, there exists always dinner you’ll be able to reserve in a very restaurant.

  25. Tyrone

    It just isn’t advised that you mix materials and be aware if you have items which are gold plated. After that you simply would want to use silver polish on each utensil to maintain its maintenance up. As people start dining, one of your respective guests see the rust appearing at the tip of the fork that she was planning to put into her mouth.

  26. Lisa

    Your style is priceless — and after reading only the salted steak post and this negative calorie post, you are now my fave food blogger…thanks for the great laughs and awesome techniques

  27. Frantic Frenulum

    I am a little skeptical of microwave cakes since I made some with students last summer and they turned out super dry and crumbly… of course, that might be because we overcooked them… Hmmm…

    But this recipe, negative calories or not, looks awesome. I might use coconut oil (the healthiest oil out there) to help the banana keep the cake moist. I can’t wait to try it out! Gonna go buy ramekins from the bakery shop near the school where I work.

  28. Frantic Frenulum

    You seem like an idiot who doesn’t understand how humor works. You’re proof that there should be an intelligence test before you are allowed to post comments on the internet.

  29. Bella

    I just have to point out that I feel like no one actually read the whole thing. She says it’s negative calories because you get points for eating such a brilliant dessert, not that the dessert itself has no calories. My only problem is that I don’t actually know how many calories are in this, but I’m sure there’s a way to figure it out.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *