Oooh…take a bite of this Rolo Pretzel Turtle!
I think this will be the first year in the history of Steamy Kitchen that I’m not hosting Christmukkah as planned. And honey, you have no idea how ecstatic I am! I just got word that my friend, Lisa, has offered her brand spankin’ new home for the event.
It used to be that my house was the default home for all holidays and dinners. You know how on “Desperate Housewives” Bree is the queen of all things elegant, gracious and homemade? I’m Bree, but without the elegance or the shiny, perfect hair. But because I’m not going to be spending the day in the kitchen covered in spills, splashes and sweat preparing a 10-course dinner, this year I get to be Gabrielle. Well, Gabby from last season, when she was all about glam and glitter.
And I’ve already got the perfect outfit in the closet. I’ve worn it only once before, about seven years ago. It’s an off-the-shoulder sexilicious dress, 4-inch candy-red stilettos and sparkly, drippy jewelry. Call me “haute mama.”
Just a slight problem, though.
I’ve got less than a week to lose 15 pounds and inflate my boobs to B.C. (Before Children) proportions.
Being a guest instead of the host of Christmukkah is such a rare treat that I’m determined to be Gabby. I can stuff, squeeze and shimmy into this ensemble with the help of a can of Pam spray. There will be no bending, squatting, eating or talking above a strained squeak. No running, dancing or helping in the kitchen. Basically, I’m going to just balance precariously in my lovely heels at the front door, pretend to sip a glass of bubbly champagne and greet guests as they shower me with compliments on how drop-dead gorgeous I look.
In case I momentarily forget that I’m not supposed to breathe beyond dainty puffs, and the straining zipper fails, I’m packing two rolls of duct tape in my purse as backup.
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PrintRolo Pretzel Turtles Recipe
(recipe from the archives)
I’m giving you a recipe that would be fabulous for a party, something simple that even Gabby could manage in her heels! My girlfriend, Kelly, taught me how to make Rolo Pretzel Turtles, and I swear it’s the best seven-minute candy fix. The chocolate and caramel in Rolo candies softens and oozes all around the salty, crunchy pretzel. Top it off with a pecan half, and it’s a homemade treat that won’t last long in a candy dish. Well, truthfully, they probably won’t make it to the candy dish; Rolo Turtle Pretzels are addictive when they’re warm off the baking sheet. Prepare to make a double batch! I usually buy four rolls of Rolos, a bag of mini pretzels and a bag of nuts.
![\\"\\"](\\"http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2071/1866239974_c64482a7e8.jpg\\" "\\\"Rolo")
Rolo Pretzel Turtle Recipe
Nuts – pecan halves (or any other type of nut)
Mini pretzels
Rolo chocolate candies
Preheat your oven to 350F.
Unwrap your Rolos – try not to eat all of them. Place pretzels on the baking sheet in one layer. Top each pretzel with a Rolo. Bake for 3 to 5 minutes, until the chocolate just begins to melt. The Rolo candy should be soft but not completely melted. Remove from oven, carefully use a spatula to lift the pretzels on cooling rack and immediately squish the Rolo candy with a nut. ooohlala! Watch the caramel ooze out!
{ 23 comments… read them below or add one }
Girl, get yourself some Spanx! They are THE only instant diet around! I always feel and look at least 5 lbs thinner after I put those on! After eating all of these candies, I’ll need 2 pair!
Oh man, I remember when you posted this recipe originally (last year or so?). I made and ate these things like crazy. They were my crack, for a time. So bad for you, but so yummy
My sister-in-law just made these and it was love at first bite. I was stunned and delighted when I found out how easy they are to make. She used the square pretzels, but I think they look much cuter (and turtle-like) with the twisted pretzels.
that recipe is too dangerous!! happy holidays!
Pecans and slivered almonds sound good for this, but I think I might also try some whole meats of macadamia nuts on some. I love how the macadamia feels when I bite into it.
Spanx are your answer! They really, really work!!! You’ll look smooth and polished without the use of Pam!!!
The rolo pretzels look great too!!!
Oh yeah, we are so making these tonight. Three of our fave snacks in one gooey treat!!
“a voté” as we say in french
Oh wait. These would be so good, fresh out of the oven, with ice cream!!!!!
I haven’t had these in years, in fact, I had forgotten all about them – thanks for the reminder!!
What kind of people don’t like pecans???
These candies are so delicious and I always love how easy they are to make.
Yum–looks so good! Have a great time, Gabby.
IF only they made Dark Chocolate Rolos….
Definitely a great idea for parties.. Can’t believe how easy this is
OMG! Your Rolo Pretzel Turtles looks so glamarous and so divine, I sure wish you can get Santa to fly some over to us in Kuala Lumpur. We had been busy late, miss reading your posts will do now!
Have a great joyly Christmas! xxx
OoOoOo Yummmm…I just made these! wow..soooo good!
the only change I’d make is to leave them on the silPat while they cool, so you won’t lose any of the dripping choc or caramel, I’d hate to see my chocoholic-friend make these, as she’d be licking the plate! LOL
tyvm!!
My sis-in-law was in the same “lose 15 lbs and gain 2 cup sizes” a few years ago at New Year’s. Solution? Spanx, of course. But also… a small sock rolled up under each boob inside her bra. Crazy? Yes. Works? Surprisingly, yes! Plus it gave us something to laugh about all night long. Yeah, we’re a little wacky out here in No. Cal., but at least our sock-boosted-boobs look good. Not that I’D ever try anything like that…
p.s. – voted for ya. Good luck!
I see that Spanx is the answer but where exactly does it (the flab/muffin top/FAT) all go? I can just see putting on some Spanx underwear and it would flatten out my tummy but it would all spill out over the top! Nice not to cook every now and then huh?
What is silPAT?
Your food pictures look amazing! I’d love to know how your setup is when picturing your food.
Charles
http://pampanguenacafe.wordpress.com
How emasculated I am to find myself on a blog where the commenters are offering ways to reduce tummy-bulge and increase cup sizes. But, I do love food, so…
Try these Rolo/Pretzel thingies with Dove chocolate caramels on the square shaped snap-style pretzels. The chocolate is a little bit better quality (creamier) than Rolos, but that’s just one man’s opinion.
You’re on your own with the girdle and bra thing, however. I can offer no opinion on that, and really wouldn’t know where to begin either
(And, you got my vote on the Marx Food contest, Jaden, but according to the site statistics, you’re ahead by a few hundred noses in that race.)
Happy New Year.
oooh the rolo goodness! i had no idea that those cute little candies (that fit so nicely tucked away in my 4 yr old daughter’s beautiful new purse) had so much potential!